I think this is a normal feeling for a mom with a child that relies on you to eat and survive. I just got to trust that I am doing the right thing for Jason. I know a lot of people won't understand the anxiety I feel because eating is normal in your home. But in our home and a lot of tubie mom's eating is a luxury and they would understand. We are in a position where some tubie moms would dream to be so I must count our blessings! One day you will be there too.
He's doing well, his feeds are going well. I am trying to do as much oral feeds as possible. I don't believe he is enjoying it but I do believe this transition can help him in the long run and best for his future. The preparation is SO much harder, the extra cooking and prepping I have to do is really time consuming but at the end of the day it will help Jason and I do hope it gets easier.
The past month he really took a knock and it's going to affect his schooling, his willingness to eat and his feeding therapy. We've taken a lot of steps back and it's scary 😓.
Sunday is polygam which means another hospital admission, having to find a vein when his veins are still full of bruises from the two admissions last month. Another mental day to prep for. You never get use to polygam days.
I just keep the faith and trust that God is with us every step of the way and he knows what's best for Jason.